Author: Valerie Sawade
Publication date: 20.12.2023
“Pretending to Have It Together is the First Step to Actually Having It Together... Maybe?”
Welcome, fellow adults-in-training! If you have ever found yourself nodding along in agreement when someone says, "I can't be an adult today," fear not. Don’t feel alone because you are at the right place. In this guide, we will explore the fine art of "Adulting 101: Faking It Till You Make It." After all, who said we can't sprinkle a little humor on this journey of pretending to be grown-ups?
Lesson 1: The Confident Stride
The first rule of Adulting 101 is to walk like you know where you are going, even if you are just heading to the kitchen to Google "How to Boil Water" late at night. A purposeful stride can make you look like a seasoned professional, even if your internal monologue is humming the theme song to "SpongeBob SquarePants."
Lesson 2: Mastering the Art of Nodding
Ever been in a meeting where adult people are discussing something that sounds like ancient Latin mixed with quantum physics? Fear not! The key is the nod. Vigorous nods at strategic intervals can fool everyone into thinking you are not daydreaming about what you are having for lunch. Remember, the art is in the nod, not the comprehension.
Lesson 3: The Polite Smile and Wave
Encountering neighbors in the hallway or colleagues in the elevator? Master the polite smile and wave combo. It's the universal language of adults who may or may not have forgotten your name but are too afraid to ask again. Pro tip: Throw in a casual "Hey!" for good measure.
Lesson 4: The Grocery Store Shuffle
Navigate the aisles like a pro. Toss items into your cart with a confident sweep, even if you are not entirely sure what "quinoa" is. Bonus points for using a reusable shopping bag — extra adulting credit for remembering to bring it with you.
Lesson 5: Conference Call Yoga
For the work-from-home warriors, embrace the art of Conference Call Yoga. Pretend you are in a seated warrior pose while muted, and remember, the camera only shows what's in the frame. Nobody needs to know you are wearing pajama pants or attempting a headstand during a brainstorming session.
Lesson 6: The Expert Apology
Master the art of the expert apology. Have you ever forgotten someone's name or accidentally sent a text to your boss that was meant for your best friend? A well-crafted apology can smooth over any awkward situation. Bonus points for a sincere yet vague, "I have been so swamped lately!"
So, Fake It Till You Make It
Remember, the key to faking it till you make it is to embrace the chaos, laugh at the absurdity, and know that everyone else is probably faking it too. Adulting may not come with a manual. But who needs one when you have got a confident stride, a polite smile, and a cart full of quinoa you are still trying to figure out how to cook? Happy adulting, everyone!